The Clumpany is proud to announce that it is opening a brand new bookshop. It will be the best bookshop in the world!
In it you will find all manner of exciting publications: all the classic works of fiction, modern novels, and a vast array of factual books. You name it, and I will probably have it.
This bookshop is going to crush all the opposition. Amazon will be Ama-GONE by the time I have finished with them!
And the really clever thing is that I have acquired all these world-beating assets for next-to-nothing! In fact, I don’t think it would be unfair to say that I have pulled off the mother of all business deals.
“But from where did you source all your high-quality stock, Comrade Clumpany?” I hear you ask? “What manner of beleaguered wholesaler did you haggle down to minimal prices?“.
Well, the truth of the matter is that I adopted an innovative approach to inexpensive stock-acquisition. No conventional suppliers or wholesalers were involved. Not did I steal the books.
I could have spent, say £1m – or even £2m – on books for my shop. But why would I do that when I could simply pop down to Brighton, visit all the public libraries, and loan a lot of books to put on the shelves of my world-bearing emporium instead?
What’s that you say? “If I want to have books on a permanent basis and be able to sell them on, I will actually have to part with some serious cash at some point?”
Pah! I know exactly what I am doing with my brilliant bit of business. You must be #obsessed. Why don’t you concentrate on your own bookshop instead?