Media, Scottish Football, Sevco

We’re Not Gonna Talk About EBTs…

Good Afternoon.

Last night The Clumpany was reminded of the classic ‘David Bowie’ sequence from the 1992 Twin Peaks movie “Fire Walk With Me”.

In it, Bowie – playing a completely disorientated FBI agent Philip Jeffries who had been missing for two years – suddenly walks out of a lift in the Bureau’s Philadelphia headquarters and into the office of the Regional Director.

He then starts babbling about how he isn’t going to talk about Judy. In fact he’s not going to talk her about Judy at all. He’s going to leave her “out of it”.

He then says series of random things about a meeting above a Convenience Store and about how he “found something at Judy’s”, before disappearing into thin air.

Here is the scene in question…

The meaning of all this is not explained and the plot (such as it is!) moves on to its very dark conclusion.

Of course, the remarkable scene – in which a character repeatedly states his determination to avoid a conversation about ‘Judy’ – had only one result.

The other characters in the scene and everyone who saw the film wondered who the hell Judy was. And they continue to wonder 25 year later. Indeed, the current series of Twin Peaks itself asked that very question a few nights ago.

The lesson is clear, if you don’t want to draw attention to something, don’t suggest there is something wrong in taking about it…

Which brings me to the thing which prompted my Twin Peaks reminiscence:

Yes that’s definitely going to kill EBT chat stone dead isn’t it?

Is there an acceptable time for discussing EBTs, side letters, rigged Commissions and industrial scale cheating which has gone unpunished by governing bodies who Dick Dastardly might be embarrassed to join? Because my diary is flexible and I am happy to discuss it whenever is convenient for the BBC. Me and thousands of others.

I am guessing that Friday nights might not be good, however…

Obviously, it might be difficult for some to understand why lots of people might be concerned about a major sport – into which they paid a lot of money – being trashed without any sanctions falling on those responsible. But we are happy to explain.

If an explanation is actually necessary…

And while we are at it, perhaps we can also explain the miracle of people being able to hold and articulate more than one rational thought at a time?

Now, about Judy… I wonder if she had an EBT? 😉


NB Remember folks, it’s just a bit of fun… And yes, I HAVE done a Twin Peaks-themed blog before…