Media, Satire, Scottish Football, Sevco

The Fanta Years

Good Evening.

The Clumpany read a piece in one of today’s attempted newspapers about the so-called ‘Banter Years’. 

It’s thesis – and that is the appropriate word for such a rigorously-researched academic study – is that ‘same club’ Rangers* and their fans have had a bit of a laugh over the past five years since something unmentionable happened in 2012. In particular because a cast list of ‘questionable’ people have come and gone, leaving behind them a multi-faceted but completely hilarious mess.

A mess that only the present glorious regime of ‘Rangers* Men’ has been able to fix, thereby laying the foundations for a spectacularly bright future.

The banterfest of the past five years has apparently been so side-splittingly funny that I couldn’t read the piece without hearing the Benny Hill theme tune in my ethereal head. Which was odd, as I felt I really ought to be hearing the theme from The Exorcist instead… 😉

Oh what a laugh it has all been, as Phil Mac Giolla Bhain explains here.

LOL! Bantz! Etc.

In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if there has been a hearty round of thigh-slapping and canned laughter piped around the Evening Shark-Jump offices on a daily basis ever since Rangers went into administration.

Mind you, I couldn’t help but wonder whether there might be a problem if anyone attempted to define what sort of ‘banter’ was acceptable:


However, it would be unfair to single out one particular piece in one particular paper for criticism. In truth (and in my opinion) it is just one of the better examples of the shortcomings of so much MSM coverage of the Rangers and Sevco sagas since at least 2012.

The industry upon which a healthy, functioning liberal democracy is generally felt to rely has largely opted out of any serious critical analysis of what has actually gone on in Scottish football over the past few years. Speaking truth to power and calling out apparent wrongdoing has fallen by the wayside. Or been deliberately fly tipped depending upon your point of view.

The motives, actions and shortcomings of Scottish football’s governing bodies have gone unexamined day after day, month after month, year after year.

The succession of people passing through the Ibrox doors and into the boardroom have nearly all been cheered upon arrival and rarely questioned or challenged for most of their stay. Instead there has been instance after instance of breathless media optimism and outright cheerleading which might easily be mistaken for a season ticket sales pitch. And all during a period when fans of many clubs (especially those of Sevco) and the sport as a whole needed some serious investigative and analytical effort to be deployed.

And perhaps worst of all, facts have been rewritten and truths completely ignored simply to create a feel-good vibe around the latest Ibrox club and to avoid the simple truth that we all saw in 2012: that Rangers died at its own hand in complete disgrace, and having stiffed an army of creditors. 

The liquidation lies have no subtlety or powers of persuasion. They are big, bold, intelligence-insulting piss-takes of the very highest order, and yet the press has largely perpetuated them like the most deluded, denial-fixated Sevco fan. What’s more, some of them have shamefully scoffed at anyone who challenges their approach.

It’s been a complete shambles. No, actually it’s been an absolute disgrace and it shows no sign of abating.

Banter years?

Do me a favour!

This crushed can of Fanta – which can neither read, write nor speak, and which is lacking in meaningful content – could have done a better job of covering Sevco and the governance of Scottish football over the past few years. Even though it’s Orange to the core. 😉


NB Yes. That really was a blog based around a terrible pun… But remember folks, it’s just a bit of fun…