Media, Satire, Scottish Football, Sevco, SPFL

How Pedro Created The World’s Greatest Team


Good Evening.

Coming soon to a media outlet near you…

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How good is Pedro Caixinha?

He is amazing! Possibly Rangers’* best ever manager.

Rangers* have got one over on their rivals here. The appointment is a sign of Rangers’* ambition, which is second to none.

His team selection is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His tactical nous is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His substitutions are second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His instructions from the touchine are second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His track record in securing three points after one game is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His understanding of the history of this ‘club’ is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His understanding of the expectations of this club is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His determination to close the gap to Celtic is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His determination to get this club back* into European football is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His importance as a stooge upon which we can project misplaced entitlement on behalf of our listeners, viewers and readers is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His position as a figure about whom ex-Rangers* players will feel empowered to speak completely ill-informed upbeat bullsh*t is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton.

His inspiration as a pretext upon which Sportsound can discuss Rangers’* revival for an entire fortnight is second to none, as we saw against Hamilton. [NB Subject to Barry Ferguson’s forward diary… 😉]

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I am sure you are as delighted as me to have a press pack which looks out for the implications of the important minutiae in our national sport…

#KeepOnClumping