Media, Scottish Football, Sevco

Not Ruling Yourself Out 

Good Evening.

The Clumpany continues to enjoy the media speculation (and it is just speculation) about who might replace the resignedsackedexited Warbmeister as Sevco manager. It has now reached the stage where some outlets are reporting that various managers were asked about the job, and they said nothing, or stated that they are happy in their current role.

And that is apparently ‘news’:

I predict that the longer ‘Murts’ remains in charge of Sevco, the more desperate the media will become to suggest that various managers might have an interest. This could lead to some truly epic contortions and distortions in respect of ‘prospective managers’, such as the following: 

1) Refused to comment on speculation that he was interested in the Rangers* job, but the way he blinked throughout the press conference could easily have been interpreted as a series of knowing winks to the Rangers* board.

2) Immediately put his head in his hands, and so did not give a thumbs down to Rangers’* alleged interest.

3) Rolled his eyes at our questions about the Rangers* vacancy, which observers have interpreted as a plea to Heaven to let him move to Ibrox.

4) His carefully-chosen silence about having any interest in the job was a massive boost for Dave King’s Rangers* Revolution.

5) Declined to engage in a premature jig of delight.

6) Clearly resisted the urge to weep with joy at the very thought of becoming Rangers* manager.

7) By choosing not to utter the words  “come and get me”, he issued one of the clearest ‘come and get me’ pleas in the entire history of the game.

8) Didn’t deny that he fancied taking Rangers* to repeated Champions League glory, with the Light Blues scoring four goals in every game and Joe Garner also winning the Eurovision Song Contest.

9) Did not specifically say that he would want to be paid and have money to spend on players, thus confirming he loves Rangers* so much that he would do the job for free.

10) Is keeping the celebratory fireworks party on hold before he’s actually appointed Rangers* boss, but was clearly itching to borrow a lighter.

11) Did not blow his own trumpet as part of a symphony of joy at the notion of leading Rangers* to a glorious future.

12) Quite literally entered the debate about his potential Ibrox credentials by entering a room full of journalists who were discussing it.

13) Didn’t comment, but may have been thinking about buying bunting to show his excitement about being linked to Rangers*.

14) Had us thrown out of the the press conference, but his cries of “f*ck off you tedious morons. I am not interested in Sevco” may have been a bluff to put his current employers off the scent of his Rangers* ambitions.

You wouldn’t put any of those past the Scottish sports press, would you?