Scottish Football, Sevco, SPFL

When Sevco Didn’t Do A 4-1 Defeat

Good Afternoon.

The Clumpany notes that Sevco had a tough time at Tynecastle last night. Just like they did on their previous visit.

Poor Sevco. And well done to Hearts and their still-new manager Ian Cathro,who has had a very hard time of it from various pundits since taking over, and who hasn’t really helped himself with a poor run of results. Although it was only one good performance and one win, there was certainly an air of ‘redemption’ about his side’s thumping victory yesterday.

As for The Warbmeister, he seemed utterly crestfallen after the 4-1 pumping. So much so that his answer to the first post-match question from BT Sport – about what went wrong – was simply “I don’t know”…

To be fair to Warbo, he did then go on to express intense frustration at the woeful performance and the goals that were given away early in each half. However, I couldn’t help but wonder whether behind it all he ultimately feels that he is hamstrung by the quality of players he has been able to bring in.

The overall impression given by the former City Trader was one of cluelessness. And that doesn’t bode well for him…

The watching Sevco fans were delighted by last night’s 4-1 result

I found myself chuckling at one of his post-match remarks about the magnitude of the defeat.

“We’ve just lost 4-1. We’re Rangers* Football Club, we don’t lose 4-1. We did tonight and I feel frustrated, absolutely.”

To an extent, he is correct of course. Sometimes they lose 5-1.

But what a wonderfully misplaced superiority complex and sense of entitlement! 

You manage a football ‘club’, Mark. It participates in sporting competition which is meant to take place on a level playing field. This means you sometimes win, you sometimes draw, and you sometimes even lose.

No matter how big or important you think you are, you can never seriously state that losing is somehow ‘off limits’. That is the height of arrogance and pretty insulting to your competitors and the sport as a whole.

Warbo’s remark caused me to ponder what else the mighty Sevco might not ‘do’. Top Clumpany researchers have hastily assembled a quite striking list.

Sevco does not do the following:

  • Understand insolvency law or UEFA Article 12.
  • Pay money to the creditors of the ‘same club’.
  • Experience press coverage which is even remotely based on reality.
  • Hold regular meetings with a Nomad, despite the incoming Chairman saying that one was lined up.
  • Make a profit.
  • Enjoy a credit line from a bank.
  • Spend the Chairman’s children’s’ inheritance.
  • Have a Chairman who goes to matches.
  • Keep a Scottish Cup in the trophy cabinet.
  • Have Scotland’s ‘player of the year’ for 2016-17, Joey Barton, available for selection.
  • Possess the ability to organise a defence on a football pitch.
  • Have a squad of players with an average age under 70.
  • Own a stadium which is in a great state of repair.
  • Bring to an end the singing of ‘The Billy Boys’.
  • Have a hope in hell of ‘Going for 55’ any time soon.

I am sure that fellow Clumpaneers can easily treble the length of this list…