Scottish Football, Sevco, World Cup Of Liquidation Lies

The World Cup Of ‘Liquidation Lies’

Posted on by theclumpany in Scottish Football, Sevco, World Cup Of Liquidation Lies

Liquidation papers

Good Afternoon.

Although the Wisdom of Guru Warbs is fascinating, it is all rather serious and The Clumpany fancies a bit of fun for a change.

Regular readers will know that The Clumpany greatly enjoys pointing out the Great Rangers ‘Liquidation Lies’ which get spewed out across social and mainstream media.

Definitively Pish
Well That’s Awkward

So I thought it might be in order, to put 32 of our favourites to the test in unarmed combat via those new-fangled Twitter polls which are all the rage at present.

Speaking of rage, for any Sevco (or Rangers) fans thinking of working themselves into a frenzy about this exercise, please remember that it is just a bit of fun and I am grateful for all your hits on my blog site! If it helps, why not do your own ‘World Cup of #Obsessed Bampots’? I fully expect to be given a bye to the final where I will face the ‘best of the nearly-as-obsessed’. Hopefully it will be one of Phil Mac Giolla Bhain’s other personas…

Here are the 32 pieces of side-splitting comedy that I have identified for the contest. Apologies if your favourite isn’t listed, but hey, it’s my unhealthy obsession and I had to draw a line somewhere.

  1. The holding company was liquidated
  2. Rangers were demoted
  3. The ‘Engine Room Subsidiary’
  4. LNS concluded it is the ‘same club’
  5. FIFA confirmed it is the ‘same club’
  6. The ASA said it is the ‘same club’
  7. The ECA recognises it as the ‘same club’
  8. Sevco are picking up UEFA coefficient points
  9. The courts confirmed it is the ‘same club’
  10. Neil Doncaster’s assertion that it is the ‘same club’
  11. The ‘club’ is ethereal
  12. The ‘club’ is the SFA/SPFL membership
  13. The ‘club’ is a metaphysical construct [NB this merits its own entry separate from #11 as it specifically relates to one entertaining courtroom incident!]
  14. Rangers were unfairly deprived of 2011-12 prize money
  15. Clubs put Sevco in the 3rd division through ‘bigotry’
  16. Scottish football needs a strong ‘Rangers’
  17. The ‘club’ was sold before liquidation started
  18. HMRC is pursuing a vendetta against Rangers
  19. The ‘club’ was the victim of a conspiracy
  20. “Rangers then, Rangers now, Rangers forever”
  21. Charles Green bought the ‘history’
  22. Rangers ’emerged’ from administration
  23. ‘Armageddon’
  24. ‘Slow lingering death’
  25. The ‘Old Firm’ is alive and well
  26. Enjoying ‘The Journey’
  27. “No sporting advantage”
  28. “Imperfectly-registered players”
  29. The ‘Kit-Kat’ analogy
  30. “Unbroken history”
  31. “54 and counting”
  32. “Rangers are coming”

You will note that they are generally about 

  • the denial of liquidation and the things which led to it; or
  • the ludicrous warnings that were given about the potential impact of Rangers’ demise. 

So unfortunately there is no mention of ‘wealth off the radar’ or war chests…

Or Mr Custard.

There will be five rounds, with each tie consisting of two entrants facing off against each other. In the event of a tie there will be a replay. The overall winner will be crowned “The World’s Favourite Rangers Liquidation Lie” and will receive a guided tour of the Sevco war chest. Possibly. 😉

Each round will be drawn at random, and will not involve anyone from the SFA hierarchy.


We may all lose the will to live before the end of the competition, but let’s see how we get on. If nothing else, I am sure we can all agree that no matter how bonkers this exercise is, it is nothing compared to the lunacy which maintains that an incorporated football club can survive liquidation!

The first round draw has been made and the ties are as follows:

“Imperfectly-registered players” v The ‘club’ is a metaphysical construct
The ‘club’ is ethereal v “54 and counting”
‘Armageddon’ v The holding company was liquidated
Neil Doncaster’s assertion that it is the ‘same club’ v ‘Slow lingering death’
Rangers were cheated out of 2011-12 prize money v Clubs put Sevco in the 3rd division through ‘bigotry’
“No sporting advantage” v HMRC is pursuing a vendetta against Rangers
The ECA recognises it as the ‘same club’ v LNS concluded it is the ‘same club’
Sevco are picking up UEFA coefficient points v Scottish football needs a strong ‘Rangers’
Rangers were demoted v The ASA said it is the ‘same club’
“Rangers then, Rangers now, Rangers forever” v Enjoying ‘The Journey’
Charles Green bought the ‘history’ v The ‘Kit-Kat’ analogy
The ‘club’ was the victim of a conspiracy v The ‘club’ was sold before liquidation started
“Rangers are coming” v The courts confirmed it is the ‘same club’
Rangers ’emerged’ from administration v The ‘Old Firm’ is alive and well
The ‘club’ is the SFA/SPFL membership v The ‘Engine Room Subsidiary’
“Unbroken history” v FIFA confirmed it is the ‘same club’

I am sure you will agree that there are some tasty-looking fixtures there. I look forward to finding out which Sevco game Sky Sports is going to broadcast…

#KeepOnClumping

UPDATE [8pm, 25 February 2016]: The results of the First Round, and the draw for the Last 16 can be found by clicking here.

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