Scottish Football

The Democratic People’s Republic of UEFA


Good Afternoon (and please vote ‘Clumpany’ by 30 October!).

In August, The Clumpany wrote a piece about Michel Platini’s 2011 comments on “the importance of our organisation [UEFA] as one of the guarantors of the values, stability and equity” of football:

How Are You Getting On, Monsieur Platini?

The blog was prompted by the SFA’s decision to back Platini to be the next President of FIFA [a decision that has proved to be comedy gold], and reflected on how his declared high-minded principles related to a mountain of issues in Scottish football.

Here is the statement in question:

Preserving football’s values – Michel Platini

When writing the blog, I noted that “It is amusing to see that it was published on Christmas Day itself. Alongside messages from the Queen, Pope, and Archbishop of Canterbury etc. It really does make you wonder how UEFA sees itself!”

It seems that we need wonder no longer! Because the following earth-shattering news has broken today…


Assuming that this isn’t an elaborate practical joke, you can only point and laugh at the pompous, po-faced, self-importance on display. You can just imagine the UEFA Match Delegate entering UEFA HQ like an over-excited, tale-telling school kid bursting into the headmaster’s office:

“Sir Sir Sir! The nasty Manchester people are booing our anthem. Can you tell them off so they won’t do it again, please?”

It’s not as if UEFA haven’t got more pressing issues to deal with just now, given Platini’s 90-day suspension, and the ongoing crises rocking the governance of world football!

Are they so arrogant that they want to force football fans to show respect to the Champions League anthem? If so, UEFA is at risk of appearing like a totalitarian regime rather than a sporting governing body.

Whatever next? Fans having to salute the UEFA flag before games? A mandatory pledge of allegiance to be recited by all players prior to European games? Perhaps UEFA should appoint a “Proper Respect Tsar” to enforce appropriate behaviour?

I think I know just the man for the job…

Proper respect at all times

One thing is for sure, however. Now that UEFA have made it known that they don’t like the Champions League anthem being booed, football fans across the continent absolutely DEFINITELY won’t boo it ever again…

UEFA Champions League Anthem


Oh dear…


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