Media, Scottish Football, Sevco

“Same Old Alloa, Always Cheating”

"Oh hello Mr Compliance Officer. No, I don't know anyone called Michael Chopra"
“Oh hello Mr Compliance Officer. No, I don’t know anyone called Michael Chopra. Have you tried Neil Lennon?”
Good Afternoon (and please Vote ‘Clumpany’!).

One of the highlights of last season in Scotland was Alloa’s comeback win against Sevco in their Petrofac Cup Semi-Final on 3 December 2014. Trailing 2-0, Alloa turned things round in dramatic fashion during the final 20 minutes to win 3-2 and cause an enormous amount of mirth across the land.

The result ultimately did for Ally McCoist (notwithstanding protracted and lucrative gardening leave) and it wasn’t long before Kenny McDowall was asked to bring his trademark enthusiasm and tactical nous to the manager’s office.

To hilarious effect.

Still, at least Stuart McCall ultimately managed to turn things around and secure promotion to the top flight for Scotland’s newest club.

Oh wait…

But I digress.

That Challenge Cup game wasn’t Alloa’s only decent result against Sevco last season [they had 3 draws and a 1-0 defeat in the league] . However – and slightly unfortunately for the Wasps – the thing that most people remember about those games is the (possibly) drunk comment of one particularly aggrieved Sevco fan during their final league encounter of the season: a 2-2- draw at the Crumbledome.

And here it is.

Same old Alloa, always cheating.

And here it is again. Just because it is THAT good…

Same old Alloa, always cheating.

The clip spoke volumes about the status and state of the club purporting to be Rangers, and was quite simply hilarious.

You might think that Alloa’s apparent ‘cheating’ was just in the mind of one fan, and certainly an isolated incident.  But you would be wrong. Sadly I have to highlight another instance of rule-breaking. And this really is serious breach that cannot be tolerated, as it threatens to undermine the very fabric of our game, which is still recovering from Armageddon.

Step forward Alloa’s Michael Chopra, who yesterday offered his thoughts on Sevco Goal Machine Martyn Waghorn

Rangers ace Martyn Waghorn can be a star back in England when he leaves Ibrox, says former Sunderland teammate Michael Chopra

This Sunday Mail piece really should have come with a health warning as it contains multiple instances of one footballer repeatedly adding “-y” to the name of another footballer.

Seasoned observers of the Scottish game will remember (for example) that every time the word ‘Coisty’ appeared in a Rangers or Sevco-related article the piece was invariably utter pish. However, there was no health warning on Chopra’s thoughts and so we were left to approach them unprepared.

Chopra told the Sunday Mail “Even when Waggy was 16 you could see he was going to be a top player. At that age, he had the same stocky build he has now.”

“Waggy could handle himself against all the first-team boys. We had the likes of Higginbotham, Danny Collins and Anton Ferdinand as our centre-backs. Phil Bardsley was also at the club.”

“He was highly rated at Sunderland and was tagged the next big thing in English football. But in Waggy’s second season Keane brought in more established strikers like Djibril Cisse. So he didn’t get a chance to kick on and moved to Leicester. He did well but I’m convinced if he’d stayed at Sunderland, he could have really fulfilled his potential.”

“People will say it’s only Scottish football. [Harrumph!!!!] But it doesn’t matter what league you’re in – as a striker you have a job to do. Waggy was always going to leave Wigan after they were relegated. When Rangers came, with the size of club and fan-base there, it was a no-brainer. He could easily break 25-30 goals this season and, you never know, a club in the Premier League might take a chance on him again if he keeps scoring in the Scottish Premiership.”

Chopra apparently “came through the Sunderland ranks with Waghorn and played in the same team against Man Utd on Boxing Day 2007”, so is well-placed to offer a definitive perspective. And what a perspective it is! Classic tabloid fodder about an Ibrox outfit having a gem on their hands who has strangely not been held on to by numerous other ‘clubs’.

But then we come to the outrageous comments which must surely prompt the Compliance Officer to write a letter. Away you go Michael…

“I don’t think anyone can catch Rangers now in the Championship. They’d have wanted a good cup run but the St Johnstone defeat shows the difference between our league and the Premiership. Saints turned them over, they were comfortable winners. It’s been so easy for them in the Championship. I think that brought them down a peg or two.”


Chopra says there is a difference between the Premiership and Championship.

St Johnstone didn’t only win that League Cup game against Sevco, they “turned them over!”

And Sevco have been “brought down a peg or two”!

This is scandalous stuff! Chopra has flagrantly broken numerous rules about

Dear me! The Warbmeister must be feeling thoroughly disrespected today. I could almost weep for him.

Shame on you Michael Chopra. May the Compliance Officer have mercy on your career.


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