Media, Scottish Football, Sevco

What A Wag!

Martyn Waghorn can take a penalty as well as make us laugh hysterically

Good Evening.

You could be forgiven for wondering whether Sevconia has its own version of The Force. And whether prominent Sevconians believe they can effect a Jedi Mind trick on inferior folk.

Simply say something, and people will accept it without question.

Dave King arguably gives that impression when holding court at his always-entertaining press conferences.

And so too does Martyn Waghorn, who is now known as “Barkin’ Foghorn” in Clumpany Towers.

Forghorn has joined His Needy Warbliness in insisting that there really isn’t much of a gap between the teams in the top and second tiers of Scottish football.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary – most notably Sevco’s pumping by St Johnstone last week – the Sevconian mantra remains that there is no reason why Sevco should not be challenging at the top of the Premiership next season.

It’s a strange and somewhat arrogant perspective which insults the abilities and experience of Premiership teams, and which massively inflates those of Warbo’s team, who have (so far) only won 12 games and lost the one they played against higher league opposition.

It really is too soon for anyone at Sevco to start boasting, but that doesn’t seem to stop them…

Fresh from his coronation as the ‘Penalty King’ by the Evening Shark-Jump, Waghorn has today come out with some cracking remarks.

Remarks which are, coincidentally, the stuff of a PR machine’s dreams.

As STV reported

“Martyn Waghorn believes his Rangers side should be competing with Celtic next season for Scotland’s one Champions League spot.

‘In the short term it’s not unrealistic. It’s realistic if we get promoted, anyone can beat anyone on their day.’

‘We’re going to set our standards to get into the Champions League, I think that’s realistic for Rangers Football Club, how it’s developed and how it’s run.’

‘You can see in the cup in the previous week teams were knocking out other teams. The difference isn’t that much anymore, the gap is getting tighter and tighter.'”

Waghorn – perhaps channeling ‘Wibbling’ Wes Foderingham – sounds like he has been studying Scottish football for years doesn’t he? Rather than being a journeyman at many clubs who unexpectedly rocked up at Ibrox.

Although he hasn’t been studying our game closely enough to be able to dwell on the fact that his Sevco side were one of those teams knocked out of the League Cup last week…

To do so would be to stray from the unrelentingly upbeat narrative which must always focus on a bright future for Sevco even though questions persist about the state of their finances, and court cases have the potential to…. erm… cause all sorts of difficulties.

We are more likely to hear a Sevco player mulling over their likely Super Cup opponents should they (as is within their abilities) win the Champions League in a couple of seasons, than we are to encounter their observations on the day-to-day realities of playing second tier football for a club partly dependent on loaned players and loaned money.

Isn’t it strange how the papers are never full of chat about Aberdeen’s Champions League ambitions? Even though they are a good side, lead the Premiership and are currently battling Celtic in the real world rather than in the realms of fantasy?

It’s almost as if Aberdeen have their heads down and are focusing on the job in hand.

And it’s almost as if neither they nor the media feel that they have to behave as though Aberdeen FC is a political party and spin every bowel movement for the ‘benefit’ of a support hooked on a diet of spoonfed moonbeams.

Still, I am sure no harm could ever come from the media, players and fans of a ‘club’ only ever focusing on the positives. No matter how far-fetched they might be…

You carry on, Mr Waghorn…

This could be fun.