A ‘National’ Joke

“Stop! It’s embarrasing…”
Good Morning.

Ah, the brave new world!

The bright future!

An open society where we can all revel in respectful free speech!

An era where we aren’t expected to gratefully swallow handed-down narratives!

Woohoo! Where do I sign up?

Perhaps the latest edition of ‘The National’ can tell me?

[*Flicks through pages*]

Ooh look! There’s a Sevco article. The Clumpany LOVES a Sevco article. I’ll give that a read…

Oh dear. Oh dear me…

Martin Hannan: A trophyless season could see Gers fans deserting club

The headline isn’t the problem. It’s the content.

“On November 15, it will become Rangers’ longest period without a major Scottish trophy in the post-war era – sorry, but the lower league titles don’t cut it.”

Ah, so Mr Hannan is playing the ‘same club’ card.

Essentially, he is saying that Sevco fans have gone a very long time without success and [*gasp*] they might start losing interest!

Yes Martin, because you can only support a football club if it keeps winning trophies! As…errr Aberdeen, Hearts, Hibs and Dundee United fans will tell you…

And – of course – Celtic fans who endured the 1990s…

“It could be argued that every season since 2012 has been Rangers’ most momentous season ever as the survival struggle went on, but in one sense 2015/16 gets that award.

Another season out of the top flight would be beyond disastrous for Rangers, and even their long-suffering fans would surely start to doubt whether it is all worth the candle and the cash.”

To be fair to Mr Hannan he does acknowledge the effect of past misdeeds at one or other of the two Ibrox clubs:

“When all the putrid machinations – the tax ‘avoidance’, the arrogant colossal profligacy – over many years by the Ibrox ‘Murraytocracy’ led to the era of total chancers such as Craig Whyte and Charles Green and their cohorts, all Rangers fans should have cried “enough is enough” and taken up Tai Chi or Tiddlywinks of a Saturday afternoon.”

But then he randomly takes a truly shark-jumping pop at Celtic fans (yes in an article about Sevco…).

Brace yourselves. This is brilliant stuff…

“(Don’t bother the usual anonymous Celtic trolls giving me all that Sevco stuff, because this club is the same Rangers that was founded in 1872. Or else why do you get your knickers in a twist about it? Would you do the same about Hibs, founded as Hibernians but reborn as Hibernian FC in 1892 after ceasing to exist for a year? No, thought not. Sevco is just another excuse for a pathetic display of tribalistic gloating, and a good joke has become a bit wearisome. Rangers FC’s owners did disgusting, horrendous and cheating things, but after what will be at least four years of lower league football, it’s safe to say the club has been adequately punished, so let’s move on, please.)”


Well its good to see a mention of “disgusting, horrendous and cheating things” having happened at Ibrox.

But ‘trolls’?

You mean ‘readers who might respectfully disagree with your assertions‘, Martin?

‘Anonymous’? Too right Martin! We have seen what happens to people who venture to criticise the Ibrox club and point out that liquidation really does mean death!

But anonymity most certainly doesn’t render a (politely-expressed) argument invalid, does it?

Well? Does it?

And as for Martin’s point about why Celtic fans ‘get their knickers in a twist‘ if it’s NOT the same club founded in 1872…

Well firstly, my underwear is my own private kingdom.

Secondly, there is no question that many fans of other clubs share the view of Celtic fans on the ‘Sevco’ issue. 

This isn’t ‘Sevco’ v Celtic. 

This is ‘football fans in general not wanting to be taken for mugs’!

A lot of us feel that the game was a bogey for a couple of decades, and we are constantly being told by the likes of Martin that an incorporated football club has the ability to stiff an army of creditors, liquidate and remain intact!

As I and others have said on numerous occasions, it is an insult to our intelligence. And the more the newspapers blindly assert that the world is flat, the more we will remind them that it is actually round.

The Clumpany’s sides nearly split atthe  suggestion that the ‘club’ “has been adequately punished”.

A 10 point deduction for Rangers going into administration.

A £250k fine on ‘oldco’ (sic) from Lord Nimmo Smith.

A voluntarily agreed-to 12 month player registration embargo for Sevco in return for being granted a place in senior football.

Craig Whyte being banned from Scottish football for life.

And…errr… that’s it.

I am sorry Martin, but being granted entry into senior football ahead of other ‘clubs’ and working your way up the leagues isn’t a punishment.

It’s a privilege! 

Indeed, some might say that it was favourable treatment!

Martin remarks that “Sevco is just another excuse for a pathetic display of tribalistic gloating, and a good joke has become a bit wearisome”.

I am afraid that it was never a joke Martin!

The people who run our game would have gerrymandered Sevco Scotland into our top two divisions had fans who care for the integrity of our wonderful game not taken a stand.

Martin also blasts ‘tribalistic gloating‘. Well I think he will find that for most people – this ethereal entity included – the use of the word ‘Sevco’ is a neat shorthand riposte to some commentators and fans of the Ibrox clubs who would gladly pretend that stiffing creditors, and breaking rules is no biggie.

It’s also what the new football club was called before being allowed to change its name to ‘Rangers’.

Yes,the playing-out of what many perceive to be a sort of ‘Karma’ at Ibrox after the misdeeds of one club and the profligacy of a second, is an entertaining spectator sport.

Especially as we now know that dead Rangers’ years of gloating swaggering dominance was generously ‘supported’ by bank loans and ultimately not paying their creditors. 

And at the most basic level, which football fan doesn’t like to see other clubs experiencing misfortune? From the Sunday League to the World Cup, if the opposition ‘has a mare’, you are going to see the funny side of it.

This isn’t news Martin. It’s life and human nature.

And for any passing Sevconians… It certainly isn’t ‘hatred’. The Clumpany gets on well with a number of fans of the Ibrox clubs, and they are decent folk who just want to go and watch the football. They don’t view themselves as being on a crusade and they don’t have a superiority complex.

They gloat when they win and they get pissed off when they lose. They are almightily hacked off with what has happened at Ibrox and want things to be stable.

I wouldn’t begrudge them that. Indeed I say fair play and good luck to them!

It is perhaps worth noting that Mr Hannon has ‘form’ for writing entertaining Sevco-related pieces, as this blog from 4th May explains.

Dear SFA: Please ‘Release the (Dave King) Pounds’…

Wherein Mr Hannan suggested that that Mr King might “rein in” his millions of the SFA did not approve him as ‘Fit and Proper’.

How’s that one panning out for you Martin?

The earlier piece also appeared in ‘The National’. At the time, The Clumpany was surprised to see an apparently forward-thinking and ‘modern’ newspaper carrying such laughable ‘special pleading’ for a ‘return’ of the Rangers ‘old guard’. 

Today’s piece managed to go a step further and seems to mock readers who might refuse to accept a handed-down narrative.

Shame on them.



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