Scottish Football, Sevco, SPFL

The Gloat

First make sure you understand that this is not a GLOAT

Good Morning.

Here’s how it works:

1) Convince yourself that you have ‘defeated’ an entity that you profess to have no interest in, despite defining your identify via a sense of superiority over it.

2) Boast about the victory, crying “look at us, look at us!” over and over again.

3) Assert that your (entirely oblivious) enemy is now ‘hurting‘, and feeling ‘fear‘ because you are ‘coming‘.

4) Wait until someone finally notices your arm-waving and noise.

5) React to any ‘enemy‘ whose attention you happen to catch, by accusing them of being ‘obsessed‘ and ‘afraid‘.

6) Congratulate yourself on being a comedy genius by ending your replying with a ‘witty’ hashtag.

7) Pray someone is going to pay the wages this month.

8) Prepare for the first round of the Petrofac Training Cup.

9) Rinse and repeat.


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